When did “Mommy” turn to “Mother”?

I recently saw the movie “My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2”.  In the movie, Tula, the bride from the first movie, has a 17 year old daughter and has challenges communicating with her. Tula asks, “When did  mommy turn to mother?”   When she said that, it got me thinking about how true that is.  I want back that cute 5-year-old who needed me and called “mommy” for everything. Now, I am called  “mom,” or sometimes even “Raquel,”  or “mother” when one of my kids are upset with me.

When did the transition happen?  Why does it have to happen? Watching our kids grow should be a happy time for Matthewus, but sometimes it isn’t. What can we do to change it? We didn’t change who we are or how we love our kids, but I guess our kids changed how they look at us. I miss my kids wanting to be around me and being the center of their universes. I miss the way my son used to look at me with such amazing love. What changed?

The other day we went out to dinner as a family and I went to hug my son who was sitting next to me in the booth. Well, he pushed me away saying  “mom, we are in public.” There was a time when PDA for my children was welcomed by  them.  Now, it’s utter horror. It hurt that the thought of me showing my son love was embarrassing. What I am curious to hear from all the moms, mommies and mothers out there is whether you have had a “transition” with your title? Would love to hear from the teens as well and get their perceptive.


Mother kissing teenage boy (14-16) on cheek, close-up
Mother kissing teenage boy (14-16) on cheek, close-up





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1 Comment

  1. Rachel March 31, 2016 at 8:06 pm

    I think the language changes long before the behaviour. I got a goodbye hug or kiss long after I moved from being “mummy” to “mum”. Thankfully, I haven’t been cast into the “mother” bucket yet. I’ve learned to lap up whatever affection I get at home and spread that out over the day when I cop an eye-rolling in public. Thanks for reminding me how special those times of being “mummy” were!


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