Raising Teens

A site for parents of teens striving for sanity

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1 Comment

  1. In my case, my then 16 year old son was pursued by an 18 year old girl, when they attended the same school. She was from a large city and moved to our town to live with her mother and 2 year old half-sister. Her mother does not take a lot of interest in what she does, so she comes and goes as she pleases. She has had a totally different upbringing than my son and I had a bad feeling about her, knowing she would not be a good influence on him. This is his first girlfriend and he loves the attention. They met in his automotive class. She took the class because she knew it would be full of boys and she was determined to find a boyfriend. She latched onto my son telling him all of her ” problems” and I believe he felt sorry for her. She has written him notes saying she can’t wait to grow old and spend the rest of her life with him and she can’t imagine her life without him in it. I noticed in one of my son’s note books that she is practicing to write her “new” last name for when they are married. When my son is not in school and she is not working, they are always together. There are probably a 100 text messages going back and forth daily and hours of talking on cell phones, when they are not in each others company. Phone calls are always in private, so I don’t know what they are discussing or if she is manipulating or acting controllingly over the phone. My son won’t say anything to me when I ask questions. I can see this is an obsessive relationship and not normal behavior. My husband does not support me on my feelings. He thinks it is cute that she is so attached to him. My husband also doesn’t mind that our son is sexually active with her. I feel our son is abandoning all morals we have taught him. Needless to say, she has taken over our son’s life completely. I feel she has taken over our life as well, because we do not do anything as a family any longer the way we did before he got involved with her. Now he is 17 and she is 19 and I can see that they are headed for marriage. I don’t know how soon, but it will happen. They are madly in love with each other.
    A Heart-broken Mom.

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