Covid and divorces are hitting families hard

2020 will be a year no one will forget.

So many lives will be forever affected by COVID-19 in more ways than from contracting the virus. Lives also are affected because many families have become broken in 2020, including my own (Raquel). It feels like this year, more than in other years, couples are getting divorced.

I am stunned and shocked when I learn some of my friends or people I thought had strong, wonderful marriages are divorcing. In my circle, it’s not just one or two friends but more like six or seven! At first, I thought it was a coincidence, but then month after month I keep learning of another marriage ending. Has this virus which ended thousands of lives, ended marriages too?

I wonder how teens are handling their parents’ divorce. Our teens already have so much change in their lives in 2020 with quarantine, virtual school and social distancing. How much change can these kids take? I worry so much that we will see and feel the after-effects of all this “change” for years to come.

Are you one of the COVID divorces? Have you separated from your spouse or significant other during the pandemic? Do you think COVID and quarantines and so much togetherness had anything to do with the end of your marriage — or was it just bad timing? Are you relieved that the pandemic made you see life differently and helped you make the decision to separate or divorce?  

I can tell you from personal experience, the pandemic has allowed me to slow down and take more time for myself to think, reflect, analyze. It allowed me to take a well-needed break not only from my marriage but from the fast pace of life.

I have been trying to create a “new normal” for my kids while going through a separation during the pandemic. It’s not easy.

I know kids are resilient, but these are not normal circumstances.  As parents, we now have to hope and pray the separation and/or divorce, with all the other changes this year, doesn’t mess up our kids.

My friends and I have been communicating more with our teens and making sure they feel loved. We are trying to create a safe and happy home as best we can. 

I wonder how teens are dealing with the stress of their parents divorcing/separating. Kids typically are resilient. Maybe we are not giving them enough credit. Maybe they are stronger than we think. I’d like to think so!

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